1.
Keep
calm
and
recycle
on.
【低碳生活】
2.
I
turn
off
the
lights
so
often,
I'm
surprised
they
haven't
sued
me
for
abandonment.
【低碳生活】
3.
A
vegetarian
walks
into
a
bar.
The
bartender
asks,
"What
are
you
having?"
The
vegetarian
replies,
"Just
carbon
dioxide
–
it's
better
for
the
environment.
"
【低碳生活】
4.
Going
green
isn't
just
about
environmental
awareness.
It's
also
about
trying
to
blend
in
with
the
lawn.
【低碳生活】
5.
They
always
say
"reduce,
reuse,
recycle.
"
I
prefer
"refuse,
repurpose,
rot.
"
【低碳生活】
6.
My
friends
say
I'm
obsessed
with
conserving
water,
but
I
just
tell
them
I'm
being
"H2Ostensibly
responsible.
"
【低碳生活】
7.
I
saw
a
guy
riding
his
bike
with
a
giant
solar
panel
strapped
to
the
back.
Now
that's
what
I
call
multi-tasking.
【低碳生活】
8.
I
asked
the
waiter
for
a
straw,
but
he
told
me
they
only
use
paper
ones
to
save
the
turtles.
Now
that's
service
with
a
straw-smile.
【低碳生活】
9.
I'm
not
saying
I'm
a
tree-hugger,
but
I
do
enjoy
a
good
leaf-driven
conversation.
【低碳生活】
10.
I
tried
to
plant
a
tree,
but
it
ended
up
being
a
shrub.
I
guess
I
must
have
shrunk
the
soil
somehow.
【低碳生活】
11.
I'm
all
for
composting,
but
I
have
to
draw
the
line
at
making
my
own
toilet
paper.
【低碳生活】
12.
My
girlfriend
gave
me
bamboo
socks
for
my
birthday.
Now
I
know
what
it
feels
like
to
walk
on
water,
minus
the
holy
part.
【低碳生活】
13.
I'm
thinking
of
starting
a
low-carbon
diet.
Basically,
I'm
just
going
to
avoid
eating
anything
that
has
a
higher
carbon
footprint
than
me.
【低碳生活】
14.
My
mom
told
me
to
get
a
job
in
solar
energy,
because
it's
the
future.
I
told
her
I
was
already
confident
in
my
ability
to
shine.
【低碳生活】
15.
Whenever
I
use
a
reusable
bag
at
the
grocery
store,
I
feel
like
I'm
part
of
a
secret
club.
The
eco-friendly,
canvas-carrying
cult.
【低碳生活】
16.
I
tried
to
explain
the
concept
of
carbon
credits
to
my
grandma,
but
she
just
told
me
to
take
a
deep
breath
and
calm
down.
Little
does
she
know,
that's
the
carbon
cycle
in
action.
【低碳生活】
17.
My
doctor
told
me
to
reduce
my
carbon
footprint,
so
I've
been
drinking
less
soda
and
more
water.
They
say
hydration
is
key
to
energy
conservation.
【低碳生活】
18.
Someone
called
me
a
tree-hugger
the
other
day.
I
corrected
them
and
said,
"No,
I'm
a
tree-respecter.
Hugging
is
too
intrusive.
"
【低碳生活】
19.
I
heard
a
guy
say
that
he's
never
seen
a
hummingbird
species
before,
because
they're
endangered.
I
replied,
"Oh,
I've
seen
them.
They're
the
ones
that
fly
in
A
minor.
"
【低碳生活】
20.
My
cat
is
eco-friendly.
She
never
scratches
the
furniture,
because
she
knows
it's
not
sustainable.
【低碳生活】